Nothing is more injurious to a man (or woman) than an attack on his dignity. If he does not response, and he walks away with his head bowed down in humiliation, you have touched a raw nerve that may take a generation to heal.
Sometimes, the victims retreated to go and better their life, and return to showcase their worth. Sometimes, they retreated to go and plot revenge on entire society or their abuser.
If we survey many of the people who have become menaces to the society and currently engaging in crimes, chances are that we will find, at the back of their mind a record of past indigitations or injustices meted out against them. It may be their parents, teachers or someone outside their network.
How many times have we seen men who have been heartbroken and humiliated in love plot revenge on opposite gender just to show they are men and do not forget? How many times have we seen women who have been hurt by men turn against their future partner or the society to avenge their past? .
How man times have we seen children grow up with determination to punish people who supposedly upset them as a kid? or those who grew up believing society is not fair to them? yet, there are kids who are driven by desire to repay their benefactors of the kindness, however small, they received while they were younger.
Whatever their motivation, the society bears the brunt of revenge, even when their target point of revenge is innocent and underserving of the treatment. Even after those who inflicted them pain have departed the world by the time the avenger is ready to unleash his vengeance on society.
When we hurt people today, at our workplace and demean their pride, for whatever reasons, we sow seed of unknown repercussion; when we humiliate our child at home for coming short of our expectations, we prepare him for unknown assault on the society if he feel that is the way to go; when we cheat on our partner and turn their life upside down after repaying their good with evil, we plant a seed for gender crisis ahead of their future.
Yet, in the midst of all these are people who accept what we throw at them with equanimity and become kinder whether they fail or succeed in bettering their life after the suffering humiliation. But we cannot know what is going on inside mind of a man nor can we know what is
Love is an inexpensive tonic that can energize a toxic environment and heal our world if we but learn to understand that everyone is a creature of emotion that stores information that we send back. And that everything we throw at others will eventually return back to us or the society.
I am Isqil Najim
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