Relationship: don’t let this happen to you…



“Your relationship begins to disintegrate when you withdraw more than you deposited…soon your account will be in red…”



He did not invest in his wife. He created feeling of isolation and loneliness in the woman for whom he was once willing to die. In those days, he will travel intercity to see her and spend every available time with her, just to show that he cared. But now, he has won the prize he coveted and the wife is not on the priority list anymore. In the beginning, she was understating. “He is working for us, for the family for our security...” But as time go by, she realize she is becoming more and more emotionally abused. Her once upon a beautiful hone is now like a prison yard, where she will sleep, eat work, make babies and then wait for her kids to grow… she felt empty. She yearns for something money can’t buy. Suddenly, all the money looks like loads of shit. Her heart cried out to God for mercy, but her husband will not cooperate. Silently, alone, she swallows the bitterness of her tears and endures the emptiness of her soul...

The further, he sinks into the sins of neglect, the further the wife sink into despair....finally, she decided she has had enough. She decided she can’t go on again. She can’t stay in a home where is has become more of an extension of his husband estate… more of a prisoner than a wife. So on a fateful, tearful day of unsure emotions, she decided the marriage is dead and asked her husband for a divorce. She can no long die in silence…

Shocked to the bone, he left the house blinded by anger. His once a shy quiet wife has finally found her voice. She was firm and resolute on what she wanted. Terrified by his own fears, which was further inflated by his own egos and pride, he left the house and checked at an hotel, thinking it is a nightmare that will go away. He ordered a drink, then two, and then three, and then he lost count...and lost consciousness. He tried to drown his sorrow in beer. It failed, his heart betrayed him. He paid for a room, and motioned to the available whore around. After all he has the money; all he just wishes is for the nightmare to go. His emotion rises as his fear and gradually, his manliness.

As days scurry by, his work suffers as his life tumble in just one pack. He hit the rock, lost the contract he was working on and lost his job. Still, he keep avoiding home. It was as if his wife has handed him dead sentence and the world is nothing anymore. He found no courage in him to face his wife.

On her part, the wife waited, hoping he will call and repent. She cries. She sobs. She agonises at the thought of losing the man who was once the centre of her gravity. The man she once display before her friends as flawless, and most caring man ever. The man, who made her, looked as a queen all through their courtship. He because a beast the moment he made his first millions and with kids arriving, he suddenly become a complete stranger. It was as if he has no heart. It was as if he was cursed. But she had already briefed her lawyer on what to do. All she wanted at this moment is a genuine repentance, a renewal of commitment and a change for better. Yet, she loathes the idea of returning to that old life. She wanted to be free or be treated as a woman in her home.

Her lawyer called him. He felt betrayed. Seething in anger, ''how could she do this, I gave her everything money can buy?' He wondered. He barely has time to think anymore. Friends tried to intervene but it seemed they were late. He got a lawyer. For months the two engaged in bitter battle over custody. She got the house, the child, and the man got the mortgage repayment, as well as child support. He has been found guilty of neglect, and the marriage doomed. The judge pronounced it a ''failure.'' he has assumed that with money, he will always have his way. But money failed this time. ''No amount of money,'' said the judge, ''can compensate for love or heal the wound inflicted by wanton emotional neglect.''

Few months after the bitter divorce, the children complained of not enjoying visit to their dad. They would rather be with their mother. He sank back, looking back into 8 years of his marriage, and gradually, he comes to realize that he was at fault. He thought all need to have is the money! Money rule women, he has always thought, and he worked so hard for it. Though he started with nothing, in fact his wife provided him with his first seed capital with which he went into business. In his quest toward making money, he mingled with friends of all shades, parties like no man business, turn clubs into his home, cheated on his wife, neglect the kids and above all, he failed to notice the wife shedding tear every night. Though surrounded by opulence, and everything money can buy, love is gone. Tenderness is gone. Trust has evaporated. Kids are unable to find a father figure to look up to. And above all, she felt like one of his material acquisitions... For years, she silently endured the pain...until she had to make the hardest decision in her life.....

Now he feels he needs to go back and beg, over 2 years after a bitter divorce during which he had boasted that; ''she will miss him and beg to be back.'' Unfortunately, the wife has moved on and has found someone else. Not as rich, but endowed and full of life, faith and character. She has finally found her joy and her kids have embraced him as their dad ...  oh, She indeed miss one thing, which she was glad to miss...the horror of crying every night, hoping her husband would say a word of kindness to her.. Now, it is a memory she is glad to narrate with joy. She has overcome...he is drowning...

He sat down...looked all around and noticed that he wasn’t as financially buoyant as before...the harlots are no more coming to ''service'' his lust, his friends have smartly deserted him, and his business crumbling... In exasperation, he yelled,’’ I have failed and paying the price for my failure!''

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